I mean, really...there just aren't any words for how spectacular this is. If anything good can come from your .354 hitting superstar leadoff man hitting the outfield bullpen fence with his face at full speed, this is it.



10 other things that are making me spectacularly happy this week:

1. Derrek Lee. He's the first baseman on my fantasy team, and he's currently in the midst of a hot streak that makes the Orioles' Brian Roberts look like Aaron Boone. He's hitting .389 for the season, including .679 in the last week. He's got 8 straight hits and has reached base each of his last 10 plate appearances. Sweet jesus, this guy is en fuego.

2. Buddy Bell, who started his reign as the Royals Manager by going 3-0. Against the Yankees! Expect a statue erected in Copley Square in Boston by midnight.

3. Big Papi does it again. As I, and my doppleganger, said a couple nights ago, if you were the guy responsible for releasing Ortiz from the Minnesota Twins a few years ago, how would you sleep at night? I mean, this has got to haunt this guy each time he closes his eyes, right?

4. Next week - Chris and I fly to Chicago to see the Sox play at Wrigley for the first time ever. Ever since Mark Prior took a line drive off the elbow, the Cubs haven't lost. Meanwhile, the Sox are playing mediocre ball as of late. There's no telling what kind of game we'll see, but no matter - Cubs vs Red Sox, Wrigley Field, Chicago in June, beer, rooftops, and baseball. Does it get any better?

5. The new house. Moving from Arlington to Dallas was a pain in the ass and has taken up all of my free time, energy, and money. But it was so worth it. Goodbye traffic on I-30, hour long commutes, and suburbia and hello 15 minute drive to work, hardwood floors, and rejuvinated social life.

6. Rumor has it the hockey lockout is close to being history. Expect an overdose on hockey related posts when those boys finally lace up their skates...my withdrawal is reaching frightening levels.

7. TIVO. It's not as good as everyone says it is. It's better.

8. David Sedaris is signing books in Dallas in the middle of June. I'm all over it like Keith Foulke on a vultured win.

9. This lineup composed entirely of fictional characters played by Kevin Costner, courtesy of Rick Paulas, our favorite McSweeney's contributer. I dare you to tell me that there aren't striking similarities between Roy McAvoy and Kevin Millar.

10. Jim O'Brien out, Mo Cheeks in as coach of the Sixers. I may not have posted about it, but that doesn't mean I've forgotten. Granted, they just barely scraped their way into the playoffs last year, but I can't remember ever being this excited about an upcoming basketball season. I don't expect them to challenge the Heat in the conference finals, but if Iverson can play half as well as he did last season and Dalembert and Iguodala mature the way they are expected to, next season should be the most exciting season of Philly hoops in recent memory.